Catty Girls

Now that the show Pretty Wicked has aired and we are already past Episode 5, naturally, all of my friends and family have been watching every second of every Episode. I find that they only have one common question to ask me...... "How on Earth did I put up living with all of those Catty women for so long?"..... Now I do not believe they were all that bad at heart.....I hope.....I guess I just have to laugh about it and reply to them with a simple answer..... "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!"



I believe that there are a lot of ladies out there that unfortunately come across catty women all the time. I took it upon myself to do some web surfing and see what others had to say about "catty women" and how to deal with them. I found my search to be quite humorous and hopefully helpful to those of you who may have to deal with such women in your life. Part of me wishes I would have done this research before I left Chicago to stay in the loft :)



Classic Definitions

1. catty:
   Usually used to refer to those of the female gender, describing the typical "high-maintenance" girl. Synonym for (or may be used in conjunction with): petty, bitchy, conceited, malicious.
   
2. catty:
   describes females who feel threatened by another female's superior intellect or beauty, causing them to act mean and spiteful towards other women


3. catty:
   Generally females acting in a childish and somewhat aggressive matter; gossip whores;
   


4. catty bitches:
   females in high school who are overly concerned with their reputations often use gossip and rumours to feel superior over others when feeling intimidated or jealous of other females.


5. catty bitch:
   insecure woman who needs to slander because she is jealous

Solutions

Luckily there are actually some solutions out there. If you or anyone you know is suffering from being exposed to such creatures.......I found some links that might help



http://www.ehow.com/how_2245167_work-catty-gossiping-girls.html



http://www.ehow.com/how_2162379_cope-catty-coworkers.html



http://www.2ndfloor.org/?action=message_board&more=609093

And If all else fails, just ignore it and stay out of the drama. There is much to be said about rising above it and not letting it get to you.

The Pills, The Problems, The Phony Attempts to Make Amends....Episode 5

Dr. Jen sat me down to have a one on one talk with me about -- surprise surprise -- my eating habits. Yea like I wasn't expecting that one!!!! My weight (and/or lack there of) seemed to be the topic of the loft. At first I was kinda irritated and sick and tired of hearing it. I mean seriously, come on guys, like I do not know I am thin!!!!! I did not need to hear it every five minutes and I certainly did not need to be the center of any more gossip in the loft. I already held the title for most talked about behind my back and I was certainly not trying to beat my own record. People are really mean to skinny girls. They are way more upfront and in your face as opposed to an overweight person. It is amazing how many people will just walk right up to you and say: "wow you are way too thin" or "you need to put on some weight" or "eeew, you are too skinny" or "damn girl, eat a cheeseburger or something". It is not too often that you see someone walk up to an overweight person and directly call them out on it and then follow up with a harsh insult, and if someone was to do that it would instantly be considered cruel and heartless. Well why is it okay to insult and mentally torment a person under weight? The whole thing irks me to no end. I could get insults left and right all day long and not one person would even consider it as a mean thing. Well hello!!!!! Skinny people are just as self-conscious about their weight as fat people!!! I was seriously just sick and tired of getting all the heat I was getting. -->

As Dr. Jenn and I talked a little longer and she kept pressing the issue, I finally opened up and told her that I take A LOT of pills. She was shocked! I take over the counter weight loss pills. I DO NOT take them to lose weight. I started taking them about 10yrs ago, initially I guess to stabilize my weight and I guess I just kinda got hooked. I told Dr. Jenn that I ran out of them while I was in the loft and I was getting a little stir crazy because they would not let me get more. I brought almost a two-month supply and I guess due to the stress in the loft I went through them in record time. Wow... For the very first time in my life I actually realized how dependent I was on them. I never once would consider it an eating disorder. I mean they were all natural and over the counter!!! As I reflected and became a little more "honest" with myself, I realized it might be a problem. I did not even understand my problem. I DO NOT think I am fat and I am NOT trying to lose weight. Actually I would be happier if I got back to my normal weight, which is about 10lbs heavier, but for some reason I still have this need to take the pills. This whole talk really confused me, mostly about myself. Was it possible that I had a problem? Perhaps I did? But I did not understand because I am certainly not unhappy about my body and I would not even mind gaining some weight. That was a very confusing state to be in. I am sure not many people in the world can even relate to that. Most girls that have eating disorders have distorted views of their bodies. I do not fit that category.

When Katie moved her bed back to our room I was angry. Katie certainly did not like both Ana and myself. That was so obvious and that was fine. You are not going to like every person you meet in life. I was just fine not liking Katie and Katie not liking me. There was no reason why we could not have just agreed to disagree about our views and personalities but yet still have been civil just to keep peace in the loft. I did not have to be Katie's friend. I was not going to go out of my way to hurt her or start drama, but I certainly did not have to be best buds with her. I felt like she only moved her bed as a fake desperate cry to the judges that she was trying to change because she was so close to going home a few times. I knew Katie did not want to be in our room, and actually I was happy with having such a big huge room to just Ana and myself. It allowed me much more personal space and I was able to have some quiet time much easier only having one girl in the room with me. I was not too happy about the toast she gave us at dinner either. I would like to believe Katie was sincere, but I do not think I really can.

I have no clue what Anna was trying to do when she told the judges I turned the water on in the bathroom because I was insecure about being mic-ed. I find it funny because I am sure any normal person would be insecure about that. Most of the girls just happened to forget about it after a day or two. I guess I never got over it. Here we go again! Back to my eating habits and weight issues. I swear the Sarah C. fascination just keeps going and going and going and going. I should be endorsed by Energizer batteries! Everyone is beyond obsessed with accusing me of stuff and I guess creating my own story for me. I just can't wait to see what happens next.

Lies And Cries....Episode 4

When Mia stopped by the loft with the sash game my initial thought was, "Oh sh*t! This is not going to be good. Most of the girls here do not like me!" I was a bit nervous to see what I would get labeled with. Luckily Sarah R. had to label me and she was nice about it. I got to label Katie. It was hard to be nice because she was my least favorite girl at the time. I tried to be as nice as I could. I chose stylish because...well that is all I could really say nice about her. And I chose catty because...well that is obvious! When I walked into the loft I thought I was playing a different game so I lied about my age. I did not want the girls to think I had life experience as an advantage. Right from the beginning they were trying to figure out what I was lying about. I also had to watch a lot of my stories because most of them did not add up due to the extra years I was pretending I did not live. When I broke down about my age last week it made everything else appear as a lie too. My timeline was all out of whack and it made it look like I lied about a whole lot and most of the girls just jumped to a lot of conclusions as well. THE MORAL OF THE STORY: IF YOU TELL ONE LIE, EXPECT TO TELL MANY LIES TO COVER THAT ONE LIE........AKA.....DO NOT LIE!!!! -->

I am not sure how honest the other girls were about their stories to Pat. I was emotionally choked up about my story and did not really pay attention to what everyone else said. The pressure of the other girls watching me kinda made me crack. I quickly left the room after my story and did not listen to the other stories. Actually it didn't matter. I was only there to change myself, not the other girls ;) At that time I was not sure who the least trustworthy girl was. I did not think I could really trust anyone. Sad to say, but everything I said was twisted and thrown back in my face. I can say, that out of all of the girls I could trust Ana and Sarah R. the most. They may not have gotten along, but both of them appeared to be the most genuine. I hoped I was right about that.

I had mixed feelings about Qui leaving. Naturally, as we all know, Qui was pretty nasty to me. She had it stuck in her head that I was lying about a whole lot. It all started with the Pat interviews. Qui accused me of lying about going to school and then it led to a bunch of other things such as I was not from Chicago and god knows what else. At first I was very confused. I had no clue where this was coming form. I had no clue why she would even care if I went to school, which I did (Moraine Valley Community College and then St. Xavier University as an English major). I tried to talk to her and even showed her my driver's license that had my address on it, but she would not take it as valid proof. When we got down to the judge panel for the first time I realized why she was so upset. She thought I stole her story and used it for Pat's interview. Wow! It kinda made sense now.

I remembered me and Qui sitting at the kitchen table and we had a heart to heart talk. She told me she was confused about life. She went to school and switched her major a bunch of times and studied various fields because she had no clue what she really wanted to do. I understood exactly where she was coming from because I too switched my major a whole lot. I wanted to be a cop, then I wanted to study psychology, then I got into health and fitness in hopes of being a personal trainer, then I wanted to study Kinesiology. I took event coordinating classes, travel agent classes, and business classes. I studied sociology, and then I ended up as an English major and dropped out of school three classes short of a bachelor's degree because I had a personal injury and my physical therapy interfered with my schedule. This was three years ago. I never went back because I realized my only true passion in life has always been acting. I took many classes growing up and was always in plays. I felt I was getting a little too old to just sit back anymore. I would hate to live life with regrets so I put all my efforts into pursuing my acting career. Well at the time when me and Qui had this conversation I was lying about my age and there is no way it would have made sense if I revealed all of that information to her. It is impossible for me to have done so much and dropped out three years ago only being 21years old. So I simply stated: "Yea I know exactly how you feel, I have no clue what I want to do either." -->

After I realized what had happened and why she was so mad, I felt really bad. I almost feel like the reason why she left was because of me. True she was too stubborn to let it go, but she had that impression because I held back so much information. I was a bit disappointed at the whole situation because I really liked Qui. Prior to the whole Pat interview thing we really got along. For the first time I actually saw how a stupid little lie, such as an age, had such a huge impact. It really made me think about a whole lot. And unfortunately I never got to tell Qui my side of the story. She had to leave the loft immediately after elimination. Whether or not she would have even listened to it and/or believed it, I would still like to apologize to her for making her believe that I stole her story and tell her that I should have been more upfront when we had that conversation and that I knew where she was coming from because I did the exact same thing. So if you are reading this Qui, I am sorry. I know where you are coming from girl because I did the same thing. I switched my major a ton of times and aside from acting I still have no clue what I want to do with my life.

Confessions, Comedy, Crazy Drama... Pretty Wicked Episode 3

As I open up more this week, I find my world in the loft becomes a whole lot more complicated. The girls all seem to be incredibly mean and judgmental. I was under the impression that this is about self-improvement and I find that everything and anything I say can and will be used against me. I opened up about my father and instantly everyone equated that to my standard for dating older men. I stated that growing up, I was jealous of my brother and I wanted to be an only child so bad that I wished him dead. The girls of course blew that way out of proportion. They all twisted everything to make it look like I was a psychotic crazy bitch. I certainly was not happy about this. I confided in them that I felt so bad to this day about how bad I treated my brother and it was thrown back in my face to make me look worse. I am really starting to hate being here. At this point I just want to go home. I feel like I am living with a pack of wolves. These girls are ruthless.

Another issue that rises is the thought of me having an eating disorder. It appeared to be the topic of the week. There was lots of gossip and to be honest I was pissed. First of all, even if I was on the verge of dying from starvation, the girls certainly would not care. They would just look at it like one less girl in the house and one girl closer to winning. I found that the gossip was more just for the sake of gossip. Something to talk about, something to put focus on so that certain people can slip under the radar of conniving, intent to bring everyone else down. I find it to be pretty harsh to accuse someone of something and have no information to back it up. -->

At first when we found out that the challenge was a comedic roast I was so happy. I thought I would master it due to my acting and improv classes.... Acting is my true passion!!!! Growing up I took numerous classes and performed in numerous plays. I thought my background with acting and my recent studies of improv would help me win the challenge for sure......lol....I guess I was wrong. I wanted to do impressions of the girls and I thought it would be the funniest way to make fun of them because I would do nothing but portray how they are....even use their own words. Apparently it did not work because nobody in the audience understood it. Perhaps I should stick to acting and ease off the comedy for a while... LOL

At this point, Katie was definitely my least favorite person in the house. There is just something about her, I cannot even explain it. She is sneaky and I know she gossips a whole lot about me. I do not really like girls who gossip...I have no tolerance for petty catfights, which is her specialty. I was probably looking forward to roast her the most. Ana is probably my closest friend in the house at this point. She is the one who connects with me the most. Everyone seems to hate both of us -- we have our own bedroom, we both smoke, and we kinda look out for each other. She is definitely the only girl in the house I am actually glad is still there.

Skid WHERE??? SKID ROW.....WOW! Pretty Wicked Episode two

Initially the five things I could not live without were all materialistic. Since the show, I have grown to realize there is a lot more to life than "stuff." I would have to say that today the five things I cannot live without are friends/family, laughter, the gym, music, and great conversation. I guess everything else is nice and of course it is wonderful to have "stuff," but at the end of the day, it is just meaningless! I have realized that "stuff" can be very misleading. When you base your life on "stuff" you are never happy because you are always striving for more. Something else always sounds bigger and better, things get old, and there is never any true contentment. Living a life centered around "stuff" is like trying to find the pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. It is an unattainable goal and you are always reaching for more. You need other things in your life to fill the void. -->

The trip to Skid Row was amazing and awakening. Before Midnight Mission, I never really gave thought to the homeless. I mean I would pass by them all the time considering I live in big city, but I never really stopped to think about it!!!! Going to Skid Row was definitely an eye opener. At first I was seriously scared. I was very far out of my element and all of the people certainly did not look nice and friendly. However, looking back now, I am so glad we went there. It gave me an understanding for people that have so much less in life. It made me realize how much I truly take life for granted. I thought about how much I value "stuff" and how shallow that really is. Overall, I am really glad we volunteered at the Midnight Mission. It was my first charity work, and I will now continue doing charity for the rest of my life. I realized how good it feels to help others.

At the auction I was so confused as to what to donate. I really had no clue who was coming but I definitely wanted to raise the most money for the Midnight Mission. As I looked through my bags I was getting more and more discouraged. I just could not imagine people seriously bidding on my stuff. My only thought was that the only people that would seriously appreciate anything I brought, which was mostly clothes, would be females about my size with my taste in clothing. This freaked me out because for some reason I did not think that would be the demographics for the auction attendees. So needless to say, I chose to think a little outside of the box. I ended up donating a couple hundred dollars worth of gift cards I happened to have in my purse, some nice jewelry, and the hardest thing to part with, my favorite hat!!!!!! I felt that the gift cards would be a very wise choice because they had a face value and would appeal to more people. I thought that is was my safest bet to get definite money for the charity, which was my main concern.

When Ana called Sarah R. out for her fake purse, I was a bit surprised. In a perfect world Sarah R. would have spoke up herself and clarified the situation, but I do not think she was even given time to do so. Luckily, I had nothing to do with it and I was happy to stay out of the drama.ANOTHER ELIMINATION NIGHT!!!!!!! Oh boy...just as nerve racking as last week. It is hard knowing that someone will be going home. This week I was a little less nervous than last week. There was so much drama that the other girls caused and/or were involved in that I was pretty sure I would slip under the radar of even being in the bottom three. I was right! It was Sarah R., Amber, and Julin. I am not sure what I would have done at this point if I were the judges. Sarah R. had a huge flip-out and would not apologize for it and Amber actually left the loft. At least Sarah R. and Amber clearly have room for improvement and change, which I understand is the point of this. Julin ended up going home and I am sad to see her leave, but I would have been sad to see anyone leave.

Blog from first episode of Pretty Wicked

Wow am I in for a surprise!!!! This is not the Hollywood's Next It Girl!!!! The game is to change my "Wicked" ways???? Talk about insult of the year!!!! Well this puts a whole new spin on things!!!! I thought I was supposed to Diva it up, and now I am supposed to self-improve??? Ok so I am a bit spoiled. I am self-centered. I am cold. I avoid all conflict. I say what one wants to hear so they like me and I can use that to my advantage. I am superficial, and I always get what I want when I want it! What is so bad about that? Doesn't every girl wish they could pull that off without making any enemies??? I do it all in a pleasant way. I do not offend anyone. I am not a b*tch...well at least not to your face. I may have different motives, but all in all I am considered a nice person. Ha ha! I guess people just do not know the real me, but how insulting!!!!! I have to change my "wicked ways"? WTF!!!! I might as well be on Jerry Springer show!!!! I am not sure how well this is going to work. I love me. My friends love me. My family loves me. Hell, strangers love me. Why should I change?????

Well I could use a self-makeover. As wonderful as my life may seem, I do kinda hate me, but nobody knows that!!!! And I am not sure I want to share that! Boy oh boy! This is going to be a lot harder than I expected! My first impression of the girls was overall not quite what I expected. I thought I would walk into a room full of catty mean girls, which I was supper worried about. Amber was the first to greet me. She jumped up and gave me a welcoming hug. Wow talk about shocking!!!! I was a bit happy. It broke the ice and made me feel not so nervous. I instantly thought all of the girls were nice. Sarah R and I hit it off right away because we are both from Chicago and have the same name. Ana brought the cutest dog I have ever seen. I was so happy that there was a dog in the house. Jillian appeared to be so quiet, almost like she was above the room and was not willing to converse with us because we were her competition. Vanessa, well she looked like a hooker, but I gave her credit for being so brave with her sense of fashion. I honestly was completely shocked when she mentioned bl-- j--- as her specialty. Wow!!!! Who says that???? Qui...well I did not have much of an opinion of her yet. She just seemed there. I thought Reena was definitely going to be the b*tch of the house. I could see that she was already trying to call everyone out on everything. I was not sure if I was going to like this girl. Oh and then there was Katie, last but certainly not least. I did not like this girl at all. There was just something about her. She reeked a fake and phony aura. I could tell that she was one of those sneaky girls that loves to come off soooooo sweet and innocent, but was made of pure evil. -->

My strategy for winning the competition was quite unclear. The whole game got twisted on me and I defiantly needed a day to rethink how I was going to go about it. One strategy I had was defiantly lying about my age. I was older than most of the girls here, if not the oldest. I certainly did not want any life experience and/or life knowledge to be held against me. I wanted them all to think I was on fair playing grounds. Most of the girls were 23 so I stuck to that age to play it safe. I luckily look young ;)

And for the record, I have had a few boyfriends pay my bills but it was only ONE at a time :) They did it out of love for me and I never once asked for a single penny!!!! I just happen to find men that are willing to treat me as the princess I deserve to be. A rich guy is like a hot girl. They are a dime a dozen!!!! Just because you are wealthy does not make you wonderful. You need more than that. But if you happen to be so lucky as to find a wealthy guy that you have a connection with then life can be nice. Just find one that you get along with and have a mutual respecting and loving relationship with. Well I happened to find that and ever since I have been a princess.

My sash says "total liar." Ha ha! I am not sure how I feel about that. On a scale from 1 to 10, I would like to say that it applies to me at about a 1. But then again I guess I would be lying. I am not sure if I really lie. I just adapt to every situation I am in. I guess I am good at telling people what they want to hear ;) If I could have picked my own sash it would have said "Princess in Pink."When I found out there were no mirrors in the house I freaked out! I did not even bring a compact! I use mineral makeup and there is no mirror on my jar of powder! It would never occur to me to bring a mirror. What kind of house doesn't have one???? I thought it was a joke at first! I was not happy.

I found out that we had to prepare a party for 10 men. At first I thought, oh wow, finally some fun!!!! My ray of sunshine came to a quick halt when I found out that we could not use any outside help!!! You mean we have to cook, clean, and decorate ourselves????? No ordering out? Not even a catering service? Four of the girls went to the store and bought supplies. Oh did I want to be one of the lucky ones to be delegated that task! Shopping I can do! Cooking and cleaning? Well let's just say that the only thing I make back home is reservations!!!! I however did end up in the kitchen. It was not easy! We did not have the proper tools provided in the loft. I ended up making a veggie tray and appetizers. Surprisingly, I truly enjoyed it! I made sure everything was color-coordinated and perfectly placed. It was a beautiful presentation and I really got to bond with Jillian in the kitchen. By the end of the day, I was glad to have made a beautiful display of food

The men showed up and to our surprise they were all blind. My initial thought was more of an ironic humor than surprise. I just could not think of a more clever challenge for us to have. We literally spent all day centered around appearance -- everything from the decorations to the food to our outfits. We even made sure the whole loft was spotless. Seriously, I changed my outfit four times before deciding what to wear. For a brief moment I felt kinda stupid, but within a few minutes that was quickly forgotten. All of the guys were great. They were so down to earth and really seemed to have a great appreciation for life. Not a single one of them displayed any sense of bitterness towards life and or their disability. They all had goals and were working towards good causes. And to tell you the truth, it was wonderful to not be judged by my looks for once. The guys really liked me for me and that made me feel great. Julin won the challenge and Ana lost the challenge. I am not really sure if either of them deserved it or not. I was so busy getting to know the guys that I did not even think to pay any attention to the behavior of the other girls. I do know it caused a whole load of Ana drama though. LOL.

Elimination day!!!!! Oh boy... HEART POUNDING... BREATH SHORT... STARTING TO SWEAT... NO CLUE WHAT IS TO HAPPEN... FEELS LIKE WE HAVE BEEN STANDING IN FRONT OF JUDGES FOR HOURS... DEEP BREATH... OK IT IS OVER!!!!! Jillian went home and actually, I was not surprised. She did not want to change and she certainly did not seem up for the challenge. I personally liked her more than some of the other girls, but I am not here to make friends (I guess).

A Smile Can Save The World

A smile can save the world...... Just a simple smile can reset the entire mood. Just think......I mean really think....a smile holds a lot of power. A smile can change the outlook on everything, not only for yourself, but for others as well.

Have you ever had a down day, I mean a really down day, and then for some reason a stranger walks by and just passes a huge genuine smile and it snaps you back into the reality that life can be happy? I am sure I am not the only one who has experienced this feeling. It changes your whole mood!!! I have made an appoint to try to smile at as many random people as I can and it has changed my whole world. I mean even little thing, like checking out at a convenient store or smiling at a waiter. It is amazing how different people are around you when you give off positive energy. They tend to feed off it and pass it back.....try it some time....just smile at someone....it makes a day!!!!

Smiles can also bring happiness to relationships. Remember the last time you were down and you confided in a friend and they just gave you a big smile???? I bet it made you appreciate the happy times. Try to start off every conversation with a smile and see where it takes you.

A smile can also be good for the one smiling!!!! I once heard that laughter is the best medicine for the heart. I hold that to be very true and guess where laughter starts.......yep that is right.....a Smile!!!!! We all create our own realities and how we view life is how we life life. The mind is a very powerful thing and will believe anything you feed it. Try feeding your mind happy thoughts and see where it takes you! Hopefully it will take you to a smile and then you will have the power to pass it on to others.